george carlin quotes on politics

Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. What do dogs do on their day off? WebTop 10 George Carlin Quotes. If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. An early crusader against academic fascism, George Carlin fought political correctness long before it took root, foreseeing its regressive tendencies and propensity to become neo-puritanism.For decades, progressives and liberals resonated with Carlin--they were his base. The [], The 4th President of the United States was an American statesman, diplomat, and Founding Father. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. God has. Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it. ~ (George Carlin). Web390K subscribers in the quotes community. I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. ~ (George Carlin). Im sure as soon as the election is over, your country will improve immediately. It's important in life if you don't give a shit. On the face of it, one could say that he was an exceptional sociocultural critic who left a lasting mark in modern society through his witty reflections and incredibly entertaining sharp statements. Cocked, locked, and ready-to-rock. 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It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control peoples language with strict codes and rigid rules. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Something lofty and poetic: "Nay Family Way"; something earthhy and crude: "Mom Bomb"; something for the youngsters, "Junior Miss"; here's a real man's product, "Inconceivable"! Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? Who would've ever thought radical feminists would team up with religious zealots to usher in a new wave of censorship and control?Oh, if Carlin was still alive today. They made questioners out of us and they really didnt have any answers. 125 George Carlin Quotes 1. Trump's latest attack addresses DeSantis' overseas trips to the U.K., Israel, Florida's Covid-19 record, and polling support for the 2024 Presidential race. I put a dollar in a change machine. Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breathe away. ~ (George Carlin). May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.. "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is The career of comedian George Carlin (19372008) spanned five decades, with his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" being in 1962. Fuck hope. Posted at 11:33 am on May 22, 2022 by FoundersGirl. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. ~ (George Carlin). This is the best we can do folks. Teach them to question what they read. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. But once youre born, youre on your own. Feel free to indulge in the philosophy and comedy of George Carlin, expect to be offended at least part of the time. They're all in favor of the unborn. Im not sure thats the way to fight discrimination. ", "Careful. Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. ~ (George Carlin). I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be. ~ (George Carlin). April 18, 2023, To Get Exclusive Deals, Latest Products, Free Articles & Libertarian News, 2023 Libertarian Country. Beneath George Carlins biting sarcasm and razor-sharp wit lay a heartfelt indignation at the injustices he observed in the world around him. If you're born in America you get a front row seat. The real owners, the big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions.And, now, they're coming for your Social Security. That was me when I was fourteen. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. My first rule: I dont believe anything the government tells me. ~ (George Carlin). Shares George Carlin Quote About Politicians 43. 58. I was thinking about how people seem to read the bible a lot more as they get older, and then it dawned on metheyre cramming for their final exam. Carlin left a wealth of social, political, and religious commentaryand most of it was highly critical. The real reason that we cant have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post Thou shalt not steal, Thou shalt not commit adultery, and Thou shalt not lie in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. Why is it called tourist season if we cant shoot at them? ~ (George Carlin). Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. ~ (George Carlin). The shit they shuffle around every four years doesnt mean a fuckin thing. WebThis is the best we can do folks. If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. Its perfect. 105. 71. As for me, Ill be home on that day, doing essentially the same thing as you, the only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im going to have a little something to show for it folks. 101. 61. However, he calls himself an apatheist (meaning that he's an atheist who doesn't care about the topic). The upper class keeps all of the money, pays none of the taxes. I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. ~ (George Carlin). Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. In America, anyone can become president. The owners of this country know the truth: Its called the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. Governments dont want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to passively accept their situation. ~ (George Carlin). Two reasons I dont vote: first of all, its meaningless. He was a spiritual atheist as an adult. 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Ironic that political wings have come to fight over claiming Carlins humor for their own affiliations when his comedy career was a controversial compilation of his own bold assessments and ruthless truths that could offend anyone and everyone on a given topic with neither prejudice nor remorse. Though he was obviously against Republicans and evangelic conservatism, he also had a penchant for beating up liberal Democrats. I just dont have as many people who believe it., "I'm completely in favor of the separation of church and state. George Carlin Quotes The planet isnt going anywhere. Its because volunteers work for no pay. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. They've long since bought and paid for the Senate, the Congress, the statehouses, the city halls. Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. 33. 79. Tax them. George Carlin Quotes - BrainyQuote I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? 27 George Carlin Quotes For Freethinkers and Rebels, Skip our thoughts on George Carlin and jump straight to the quotes, 26 Voltaire Quotes Everyone Should Read Today, Bipartisan Bill Would Ban Children Under 13 From Using Social Media, Anti-Gun Yard Signs Are an Invitation To Criminals. Others see it half empty. Im completely in favour of the separation of Church and State. He joked about it but he was dead serious. I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, 'There is no "I" in team.' If youre born in America you get a front row seat. ~ (George Carlin). Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Quotes, 60 Confidence Quotes to Help You Understand Your Self-Worth, Golfer Tattoos His Dads Advice on His Arm How Those Last Words Help Him Focus, Time Flies: 29 Couples and Families That Mastered the Art of Recreating Old Photos, This Couple Bought and Revamped an Abandoned Laundromat Now Its a Thriving Community Hub With Free Laundry Days, Woman Buys 3-Year-Old a New Bike After She Finds Out His Was Stolen Only Later Does Everyone Find Out Her Real Story. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. George Carlin March 24, 2023. 40. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care Weather forecast for tonight: dark. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. And secondly, I dont vote cause I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. In America, anyone can become president. I have as much authority as the Pope. Deal with it. Never let the brain idle. The government doesnt care about you, or your children, or your rights, or your welfare, or your safety. Considered as one of the greatest stand-up comedians of all Life is not measured by the breathes you take, but by the moments that take your breath away. If honesty were suddenly introduced into American life, the whole system would collapse. ", "The owners of this country don't want that. 112. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to nine months. WebNov 15, 2014 - Explore Boopsie's board "George Carlin:::Political quotes:::::" on Pinterest. Garbage out. Now it's the zombie liberal.They say politics makes strange bedfellows--because today, the first amendment is under attack from people on the right and the left. ", "Conservatives say if you don't give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. People always tell me Have a nice day. Well what if I dont want to? Its what our system produces: Garbage in. Rough, tough, and hard to bluff." 16. Ice Cube and his political affiliations have been in the spotlight ever since White House senior advisor Katrina Pierson publicly thanked the Friday actor for his help in developing the "Platinum Plan" with Trump officials. People who say they dont care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they dont care what people think. ~ (George Carlin). Property is theft. When you are born in America, you get a front row seat. Well, not overnight, you cant see the sun at night. Read these quotes to gracefully enhance your views about it and make you reflect upon the essence of human spirituality! In a world where we agree on so little, it is nice to have a voice from the past whose bias can not be defined as strictly partisan. How can He be perfect? 28. The people are f***ed. - Susan Polis Schutz -- "Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music." Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. 41. The word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. No, you don't see them adopting a whole lot of crack babies, do you? The following statement is true. Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Never argue with an idiot. We get what we deserve. We think in words. The people are fucked. Laugh until you gasp for breath. ~ (George Carlin). 87 Best George Carlin Quotes On Education, Politics & Life And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. They believe a woman's primary role is to function as a broodmare for the state. ", "Conservatives don't give a shit about you until you reach military age. It creates a hostile work environment. ~ (George Carlin). 22. The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to WebFamous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. Never forget that Hitler was a Catholic. ~ (George Carlin). Its because volunteers work for no pay. That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. George Carlin Quotes on Religion, Politics, Government I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. And a In America, anyone can become president. Nobody owns anything. In recent years, the popularity of George Carlin has amplified among constitutional conservatives, libertarians, anarchists and freethinkers. Im completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. And in 2017,Rolling Stone magazine ranked Carlin second on its list of the 50 Best Stand-Up Comics of All Time, just behind Richard Pryor. When you die, it all stays here. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. "Because Carlin brutally bashed political correctness and used vulgar language--some of which is considered taboo today--many neo-puritan progressives have abandoned him and completely dismissed his brilliant works.It's a tragedy that he was relegated to an unworthy status by so many on the left, considering how deeply sympathetic he was to marginalized groups who have suffered oppression, abuse and mistreatment. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough not to quit. 30 Best George Carlin Quotes The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. The planet is fine. Here are some of our favorite George Carlin quotes on politics. Enjoy! 10. In America, anyone can become president. Thats the problem. 11. I call him Governor Bush because thats the only political office hes ever held legally in this country. "In America, anyone can become president. After harping on his skepticism of politicians, particularly Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden, 51-year-old Ice Cube doubled down on his distrust of the government on Tuesday by sharing a famous quote by the late, great comedian George Carlin on Twitter. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. I call him Governor Bush because thats the only political office hes ever held legally in this country. George Carlin Its never going to get any better, dont look for it. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. 87. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote - Goodreads They should be giving their money to you. We have multiplied our possessions but reduced our values. 55. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea. ~ (George Carlin). Could it be everyone? George Carlin [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. When you step on the brakes, your life is in your foots hands. 100. He also suggests that politicians are merely the puppets bringing big businesses plans and ideas to fruition. Here is an entire class of people guaranteed never to have an abortion. Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice? Former U.S. representative wonders: Can you keep an (Anthony) Weiner down? Weve learned how to make a living but not a life. ", "Here's all you need to know about men and women. The [], Characterized by a direct and lucid prose, uncluttered from literary devices that seek to please or entertain, George Orwell, was [], How many possible words and phrases are there to express love and romance? He was one of the first to know it was all bullshit propagated by government and corporate elites. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death. I do this real moron thing, and its called thinking. But once you're born, you're on your own. And they own all the big media companies, so that they control just about all of the news and information you hear. But who is confident enough to give their persona the name Hendrix? They don't like him because the media and the academic elite have brainwashed them to the point where they cannot think beyond liberal orthodoxy.Carlin remarked that it was a terrible shame that liberals were leading the war against free speech. Maybe this time itll work. The word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. ~ (George Carlin). Indeed, George Carlin was in a class of his own, however this would only be half the story. 122. He was a true originala brash, intelligent, eloquent voice that cut to the quick. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? ~ (George Carlin). ABC News: LGBTQ+ lawmakers finding themselves fighting literally just to exist, Antony Blinken too busy to say if he accepts that Hunter Bidens laptop was not disinformation, Heres the Montana state rep whod rather her daughter commit suicide than transition, Super Mario Bros movie illegally streamed on Twitter, US military tracking another mysterious balloon, NYC Mayor Eric Adams says Tex. He is mostly non-political except for his involvement with the environmental organization, Greenpeace. Praise for George Carlin's social and political criticisms and his contributions to a Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. ~ (George Carlin). This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. This is the best we can do folks. -- "Dance for yourself. Though some of these people have always been fans, his social commentary and political criticisms have found new meaning--and a new home--among the right.Though the right-wing and left-wing have "claimed" George Carlin as one of their own heroes, his allegiance was always to himself (another great libertarian tenet), and wasn't going to shill for anyone.If Carlin was ever a hero, it was always for the individual, the rebel, the outcast. Teach them to question everything. 3. Maybe its because he heard we have 18 delicious flavors of Classic Rice-A-Roni! Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. ~ (George Carlin). So, have a little fun. It can help you a lot. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. Its so f***ing heroic. My mother would say, Why are you always playing alone? And I would say, Im not playin, Ma. Theres no present. 39. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. ", "Did you ever notice who it is? 74. Dont give your money to the church. Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away. 2. 38. 19. Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Fortunately, fans of Carlin are not easily persuaded that everything must align with partisan preference. And armbands. And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me. ~ (George Carlin). If God is all powerful, can He make a stone so big that He Himself cant lift it? ~ (George Carlin). Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. ~ (George Carlin). 26. You enjoy yourselves. They don't like women. Carlins incisive approach and meaningful insight was thought provoking, providing a framework for introspection, prompting us to think out of the box and to challenge ourselves and our belief systems.Here we have collected for you the most inspirational and insightful quotes of this provocative and counterculture comedian to share with loved ones in order to brighten their day and make them smile, but also to enhance your views about the world we live in and make you see things from a different perspective for a better life! ", "Selling is legal. Laugh until you gasp for breath. Something is definitely wrong. ", Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other peoples stuff., "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. For a man disappointed in all of humanity not sure he wanted to be claimed by either side. Well, we know what they want: They want more for themselves and less for everybody else.". May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house. ~ (George Carlin). "Politicians are there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. 44. You have no choice. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. Here's one for the ladies, "Nary-A-Carry"! I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood. Some national parks have long waiting lists for. I just dont have as many people who believe it. We think in language. Conservatives want live babies so they can train them to be dead soldiers. ~ (George Carlin). What's the fucking mystery? The people are fucked. George Carlin was born and raised in Manhattan, New York in 1937 and died in Santa Monica, California in 2008. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. George Carlin Quotes The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? And apparently Im not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions. ~ (George Carlin). If not, no matter." Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. They will do anything for the unborn. WebGeorge Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre gonna get selfish, ignorant leaders. 70 Wise Quotes From George Carlin | Inspirationfeed Teach them to question everything. Report 48 points POST Looking at you religion. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. Lean and mean! Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. ~ (George Carlin). How come when its us, its an abortion, and when its a chicken, its an omelette? ~ (George Carlin). Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. 89. I think its the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure. And far from staying to the safer path, he leapt time and again past the cliff of common wisdom, in the hopes of rattling us into questioning the way we live. 59. Then youre just what theyre looking for. I dont vote. 29. Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. Always do whatevers next. ~ (George Carlin). When someone asks you, A penny for your thoughts, and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny? ~ (George Carlin). A good motto to live by: Always try not to get killed. George Carlin Quotes This is not good work. When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. Maher was raised a Catholic (but has a Jewish mother). Fascism won it. This explains that although teamwork is important, what you can individually bring to a business is equally relevant. Never argue with an idiot. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people's language with strict codes and rigid rules. Regarding the fitness craze: America has lost its soul; now its trying to save its body. ~ (George Carlin). Dont just teach your children to read Teach your children to question what they read, teach them to question everything. People are wonderful. Perhaps those who can really claim him as one of their own are the commoners, we the people, caught in the chaos. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. Thats why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it. ~ (George Carlin). Keep 'em showing up at those 'jobs. I dont vote. I just dont have as many people who believe it. ~ (George Carlin). 9. The new kid in a high school with a thousand other teenagers. His comedy routines and sayings are among the most widely spread in our society. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me theyre cramming for their final exam. ~ (George Carlin). The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. Continue with Recommended Cookies. Maybe this time it'll work. If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. ~ (George Carlin). 135 Notable Oscar Wilde Quotes on Writing and Life, 105 Frederick Douglass Quotes on Progress & Freedom, 55 William Golding Quotes from Author of Lord of the Flies, 67 Salvador Dali Quotes From The Surreal Spanish Artist, 45 Tee Grizzley Quotes from the American Rapper, 32 Jean Toomer Quotes from American Poet & Novelist. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. WebAmerican stand-up comedian George Carlin is notable for his long-standing popularity from the early 60s up until his death in 2008. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose., "Life is not that complicated. 68. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain. ~ (George Carlin). First Words (@unscriptedmike) May 18, 2022, George Carlin said "When fascism comes to America, it will not be in brown and black shirts.

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